I joined the ex-Muslim community in the UK to announce their victory over my wrong thoughts and arguments, also to thank them for putting me on the right track. They have taught me the best lesson in my life and I hope it will be an example for other free thinkers in the Muslim world.
Although there are many ex-Muslim cases, what makes my case a bit different is the complete setback and failure to fulfil any of my vows to win debates with Secularists and use contemporary technological tools to spread the results. Unlike other debates where both parties claim victory over each other, I admitted my defeat in the debates, which ironically, were initiated by me.
I came from a very conservative religious Muslim family. Where, religious commitments are always carried in a very strict manner. I decided to become a Muslim scholar so I can defeat western secularists in debates, mainly in Britain as an ex- colonial administrator which acted superiorly over our predecessors. I wanted to show that tables are turned with secularists and I can logically defeat their concepts. I set this as a goal and prepared for that around 20 years. I also put a lot of plans to document the defeat of secularists after it happens and disseminate the results using new technological tools such as social media platforms, related forums, e-lectures, etc. I was overconfident and very insistent to defeat secularists in debates and become a "hero" of Islam.
I was super confident that I will be the one who will defeat secularists (and generally non-Muslims) in debates. I thought that I have a persistent iron will and it is impossible to defeat the will power gained from my faith. When secularists avoided my invitation to debate, my ego went to the sky, I really thought that I am invincible, especially when they said that maybe I should debate with a well-established senior secularist, not with them (i.e. ordinary secularists). When I insisted, they cautiously accepted the invitation to debate. It was surprising that they provided simple answers to what I considered non-answerable questions. They appeared more relaxed as they realised that I was not a challenging debater as I pretended to be. I was in an opposite emotional situation (i.e. more tense and even angry). Slowly but surely I lost all arguments and I was decisively defeated in the debate. I surrendered and exposed my plans.
In the same way Muslim scholars present newly Muslim converts on stage as a proof of their apologetic approach, Secularists and Ex-Muslim societies presented my case as a strong counter example: "A Well-Defeated Muslim Apologist". Ironically, all my plans turned on me.
To that end, a full testimony was published on exmuslim UK here:
and on social media here:
P.S. I certify that CEMB has the full rights to publish my statement, in any tangible medium of expression, now known or later developed, including without limitation the rights to archive and republish in any manner as CEMB sees fit. I totally understand that any request made by myself for CEMB to withdraw/retract this statement after being published will be safely ignored.